No longer lonely
Not that I knew it at the time.
Floating from one person to the next
Giving them my friendship
Only to have them forget me in a summer.
I didn’t know I was lonely
After all you can’t miss what you never really had.
Then they came into my life
Not all at once
Slowly
One at a time
Giving me a taste of what was to come.
They slowly surrounded me with their light,
A safety net to catch me if I ever fell.
Suddenly I knew that I was lonely,
But that was before I met them.
Now I am included and loved.
Now I don’t wish I was someone else.
I no longer have the hole eating me
Devouring me
Whenever I left someone’s house.
Now I am safe and whole
And I make others fell the same
Lifting them up when they get heavy
Supporting them
And getting the same in return.
They are my pillars and I am one of theirs.
I’m not lonely anymore
Because I have friends
True friends
That I know with all my heart
That they would never forget me in a summer.
1.) Do I ramble at the end? Do you think I could end it sooner and still have it good?
2.) Should I try to add more imagery?

This is really good! and no you don't ramble at the end, would you want to end it sooner? If you did then I guess you could...but I think its really good the way it is! ^_^ <3
ReplyDeleteI like it a lot Skit, it's pretty bombtastic.
ReplyDeleteI think it's all good the way it is ^.^
ya keep the ending in and i liked the amount of imagery in it as well...
ReplyDelete